Cry me a river.

Britney Spears, still smarting from the fact the public did not find her Dateline confessional as moving as she had hoped, has reportedly turned down perhaps what could have been the only positive outcome resulting from her weepy Matt Lauer tell-all – an endorsement offer from Kleenex, says The Daily Snack (http://dailysnack.com/celebrity_news_article.html?fSKU=3675).

"Kleenex thought it would help her tattered image if she found the humour in her tearful interview and did a comedy parody of it. The Internet is full of cheeky imitations of the interview. And she could get people to laugh with her, not at her, if she took part in her very own skit," a source explained about Kleenex’s intentions. "Kate Moss joked about losing her contracts in the Virgin Mobile adverts and it did her the world of good."

But "emotional wreck" Britney didn’t find the funny in Kleenex’s offer.

"Britney was fuming when Kleenex approached her. She wants to put that horrific TV appearance behind her as quickly as possible and doesn’t want to remind the world about it with a series of tasteless commercials," a pal of the pop star said. Right. Because still being married to Kevin Federline is clearly reminder enough.