Newlywed no longer.

You have to wonder what we really didn’t really see on Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica if Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson feel the need to hire a private judge to provide over their divorce proceedings. After all, didn’t we, the public, spend the last three seasons watching just about their every move? And, believe me, I think there were probably some moments in there that we all really could have lived without being privy to -- case in point:

Season One: Jessica sharing how she needed to “drop some kids in the pool” after lunching on fast food with family members in Nick’s hometown of Cincinnati. How ladylike.

Season Two: Jessica stops serenading a male fan at a performance to say that she’s sorry if her breath stinks. Way to make the moment extra-memorable.

Season Three: Jessica repeatedly announces, while she works out at the gym, that she smells bad, really bad, stating “my pits…I stink like a man.” Sometimes, it’s better to leave details like this to the imagination.

All Seasons: Any moment where Jessica’s creepy father/manager/seemingly permanent shadow Joe is present. Because 99% of the time, his interest in her, and the statements he makes about her, seem a bit, um, disturbing.

I guess we’ll just never know what else went on behind the scenes. Until Joe gives an interview about it, that is.